Once upon a time, I ‘stayed at home’ while my husband held outside employment. I took full responsibility for taking care of the kids while going to school full-time and, to make ends meet, working two 25 – 30 hour a week jobs (One I could do from my home while the kids were napping or playing with friends. The other permitted me to bring the kids along with a bevy of art materials and toys.) Ummm…. not exactly a stay at home mom, although that is how both he and I thought of it. Looking back, I clearly and fully pulled my weight but yet… I still felt like I was not being enough, doing enough. If I couldn’t get the laundry done or if supper turned out to be grilled cheese and tomato soup, I felt incredibly guilty. As such, I really appreciated the perspective offered by the author of ‘Being a Stay-at-Home Parent Is a Luxury… for Your Spouse’ which was posted yesterday on Babble.
The other day, I read an article in the Washington Post about a stay-at-home mother who was having a rather hard time adjusting to answering the ever-popular question, “What do you do all day?” now that the kids were at school. …
… As I read the article, I scrolled through the comments, anticipating that there would be some doozies in a post about a stay-at-home mom basically proclaiming that she doesn’t feel guilty for doing absolutely nothing all day when I came across this truly remarkable comment:
“I work full-time, and my husband is a stay at home dad. We have two kids in school full day (8 to 3). Don’t you realize how much easier it is to hold a full-time job when you have someone home with the kids? I can work late and travel when I need to and not worry about the kids. Our weekends are spent relaxing, instead of racing around to get errands and chores done. I can go back to work on Mondays having actually recharged over the weekend. It feels like such a luxury to ME to have a stay at home spouse.”
I was flabbergasted.